Fratting Hard.com

Fratty, Fratty, Fratty -- Frat Even Harder At Our New Site

2006-11-30T22:41:00.000-06:00

http://www.frattinghard.com

They Should Have Just Went Home

2006-11-29T03:34:00.000-06:00

Where do I even begin? Necktie with K-Mart quality striped shirt...hooded sweatshirts...and, worst of all, a blooper video for rush purposes? This couldn't get much worse.

The sacred art of rush should not be infringed upon in the manner seen in this video. The truly fratty need not resort to such pedestrian tactics; the best houses have potential pledges thinking, "Please rush me." They do not have the brothers making amateur Jackass videos in their newest Aeropostale attire screaming, "Rush (insert desperate house here)."

Most likely, any potential quality pledges who viewed this video thought, "If I wanted to spend my time not fratting hard, I would just join the Chemistry club. They don't frat any less than the guys in this video, and the girls there have low self esteem."

Fratty Word/Phrase of the Week

2006-11-28T13:22:00.000-06:00

In the spirit of Christmas Cocktail and Formal season, the following word should help you in the event that you are taking a date who refuses to frat hard every second of the day.

Deformalize (verb) - the act of a fratdaddy or sorostitute dumping their date prior to or during a fraternity or sorority formal or cocktail. This term only applies when the action is taken by the person who's fraternity or sorority is hosting the event.

Ex: Allison is currently my date to formal, but I am going to deformalize her and take Jessica because she frats harder.

Contribute Content to FrattingHard.com

2006-11-27T00:28:00.000-06:00

We noticed from post comments that there is some interest in submitting content to FrattingHard.com from some of the fratdaddies and sorostitutes out there that want to help show the world what it means to frat hard.

If you have content that you would like to see (or have any suggestions or complaints), you can send it to:

frathardorgohome@gmail.com

Thanks.

Example of a University NOT Fratting Hard

2006-11-24T22:08:00.000-06:00

This video is indicative of a university that, unfortunately, has completely punted the need to frat hard. The tag line of this video is, "HOT, HOT, HOT!" This is an apt lesson for the video to teach, as this is a line that the school's graduates will often repeat while advising their customers at McDonald's that their coffee is, "HOT, HOT, HOT!" Please, do not take this as a slam upon the academic standards of the institution; it is simply an all too predictable conclusion that can be ascertained from seeing a student body that goes home so often.

Fratty Word/Phrase of the Week

2006-11-21T23:21:00.000-06:00

We here at http://www.frattinghard.com/ care about building your vocabulary span in an effort to increase your level of frat in conversations with fellow fratters. From this point forward, we will give you a fratty word or phrase of the week to use in such conversations. As a first week special, there will be two words and one phrase. All words and phrases will be added to the FH Dictionary.

Shacking (verb) - The act of a fratdaddy and sorostitute sleeping in the same bed.

Walk of Shame (verb) - The walk a sorostitute must make after shacking at a fratdaddy's house.

Shackwear (noun) - A fraternity t-shirt worn by sorostitutes after shacking at a fratdaddy's house to avoid doing the walk of shame in her attire from the previous night.

Fratty vs. GDI #3 (Vehicle Edition)

2006-11-21T22:56:00.000-06:00

Getting to Class

Fratty: Making a Pledge Drive

GDI: Riding a Bicycle or Driving a Honda Element

Vehicle Miles Per Gallon

Fratty: Under 10

GDI: Over 30

Vehicle Tag

Fratty: University Name and/or Logo

GDI: Their Name - Airbrushed

Vehicle Sticker

Fratty: Greek Letters and University Name

GDI: P.E.T.A. or Apple Computer Logo

Vehicle Wheels

Fratty: Factory

GDI: Plastic Spinners from Wal-Mart

Colleges That Are Fratting A Little Harder Today

2006-11-20T01:18:00.000-06:00

With our state of the art web tracker (which we found through a Google search of, "how to see how many people want to frat hard"), we here at FrattingHard.com take care to note which universities across the world have students that are interested in learning how to frat harder.

We'd like to thank the following universities who are cultivating young minds that understand that learning to frat hard is an integral part of the college experience (someone from all of the following logged in to frattinghard.com today):

Monday, November 27th:
Washington and Lee University -- Lexington, Virginia
Columbia University -- New York, New York
Northwestern University -- Evanston, Illinois
Elon University -- Elon, North Carolina
Florida Southern College -- Lakeland, Florida

Sunday, November 26nd:
Brown University -- Providence, Rhode Island
University of Pennsylvania -- Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Wednesday, November 22nd:
Texas Tech -- Lubbock, Texas
Emory University -- Atlanta, Georgia

Tuesday, November 21st:
Union College -- Schenectady, New York
Clemson University -- Clemson, South Carolina

Monday, November 20th:
Wake Forest University -- Winston Salem, North Carolina
St. Louis University -- St. Louis, Missouri
University of Virginia -- Charlottesville, Virginia
Union University -- Jackson, Tennessee
University of Dayton -- Dayton, Ohio
University of Texas at Arlington -- Arlington, Texas

Sunday, November 19th:
Hampden-Sydney College -- Hampden-Sydney, Virginia
Mary Washington College -- Fredericksburg, Virginia
University of Alabama at Birmingham -- Birmingham, Alabama
University of Georgia -- Athens, Georgia
University of South Carolina -- Columbia, South Carolina

If you're logging in from your college, let us know in the comments section of this post.

Have a Fratty Rivalry Saturday

2006-11-17T01:36:00.000-06:00

What the Oscars is to Hollywood, the Super Bowl is to the NFL, and the Las Vegas Star Trek convention is to 37 year old virgins, college football rivalry weekend is the time when all the heavy hitters of the fratty culture come out and show why they are elites among their peers. With this knowledge, though, many among the fratty place too much pressure on themselves to frat harder than ever. Falling victims to this pressure, they end up departing from the tried and true rules of fratting hard, and end up doing things that they would normally immediately recognize as not fratty. To help prevent this unfortunate reality, please take heed of the following tips. Following the normal laws of the fratty, all while taking special care to avoid the following, will assure you a place among the frattiest in the stadium this Saturday.

#1) Don't descend into normal fandom: It is an unquestioned rule of fratology that all but the most subtle hints of fandom are forbidden. While others defile themselves with graphic t-shirts, body paint, novelty hats, and (worst of all) replica jerseys, the fratty come dressed for success with shirt and tie for guys and an appropriate dress for ladies. Don't be the one in your section that ignores this black letter rule and paints your face, wears more than one college logo anywhere on your person, or comes decked out in Under Armor. Leave such a faux pas to the GDI's and use your normal discretion in wardrobe decisions.

#2) Pre-game fratting is still mandatory: Pre-game fratting is essential to a fratty gameday. Ample tailgating with other fratters, lunch at a sorority house, and arriving just in time for kickoff to your seat saved by a pledge should be just as important...nay, more important...on this weekend as on any other. Do not be tricked into attending open pre-game pep rallies and the like by wiley university athletic marketers. Instead, take your usual fratty plans and crank them up with maximum fratitude.

#3) Don't let a loss affect post-game fratting: Where gameday truly separates the fratty from the non-fratty is often after the final whistle has been blown. Post game cocktails, house parties, or a trip to the local strip should be the mandatory plan after every game. However, the emotion bound up in a rivalry game can often make the fratters on the losing side lose heart after the game, causing them to ignore their post game duties. Know that while the game is important, no loss should be enough to (and no loss is an excuse to) completely ignore your fraterly duties. As always, you should challenge others to frat hard or go home, and you yourself should strive to be the last one that does the latter.

FH.com Under Attack

2006-11-16T14:57:00.000-06:00

We are having technical difficulties currently here at FrattingHard.com, no doubt caused by malicious attacks by GDI douchebags using their l33t haX0r skillz. The problem is cosmetic in nature, and all actual text should still be accessible.

Update #1: We have identified the issue. For security reasons, we will not reveal it, but we can say that it is undoubtedly the result of douchebaggery.

Update #2: Problem resolved. The douchebags responsible for the attack have been hazed.

Fratty vs. GDI #2

2006-11-07T21:03:00.000-06:00

Hair Style
Fratty: Fratshag
GDI: Frosted Tips

Late Night Activity
Fratty: Bar Hopping
GDI: World of Warcraft Tournament

Short Length
Fratty: 2 Inch Inseams
GDI: Slightly Above Ankles

Shoes
Fratty: Topsiders/Newbies
GDI: Chuck Taylor's

Shacking
Fratty: Only With Sorostitutes (for the fratty Male) or Fratdaddies (for the fratty female)
GDI: Only with blow up dolls

DOUCHE-OFF

2006-11-06T14:31:00.000-06:00

From CollegeHumor.com...

The shirtless ones look bad now, but it gets worse.

Killed in a tragic garbage disposal accident

Nice lipstick, Casanova

Johnny Depp, he's not.

Class personified.

Another potential hard fratter falls to the intrigue of earrings and hair gel.

Get ready to change your panties, ladies.

Future career: Habitual pornography addiction retreat attendee

It's a bird...it's a plane...it's a future serial rapist...

Didn't find the humor in the South Park "World of Warcraft" episode

I know you want to test his light saber, ladies...

When your photographer gets Photoshop for Christmas...

This guy is a Tri-Delt...if "Delta" stands for DOUCHEBAG, DOUCHEBAG, DOUCHEBAG

His idea of wedding vows: "It puts the lotion on its skin..."

The holy trinity of douchebaggery...stupid, redneck, and overexposed.

He had to read a book to learn how to douche this hard...

Q: What captures the essence of your being? A: I like 'nanners.

Lost his virginity to a Ziploc bag full of KY Jelly.

Unadulterated douchebaggery.

The fratty way to take a funny senior picture. This guy probably frats extremely hard now

Fratting Hard in China

2006-10-24T09:45:00.000-06:00

In the Far East, the need to frat hard is ingrained in children starting at a very young age. This teacher took it upon himself to make some of his middle school students hardcore fratters before they even drive.

Why have the Chinese decided that such early frat training is necessary? Simply put, it is to avoid future disasters like this. This young man was not trained on the intricacies and nuances of fratting hard, and when he tried to frat hard without adequate training, the results were deadly.

Fratting Hard Around the Globe: Sweden

2006-10-19T16:51:00.000-06:00

As we have observed before, different cultures frat hard in different ways. This video exhibits how our friends, the Swedes, frat hard...as shown by the frattiest man in Sweden, Gunther.

The Downward Spiral of Not Fratting Hard

2006-10-19T16:26:00.000-06:00

Let us consider, "Lenny."

Lenny was an average college student with an average choice: Frat hard, or go home?

Lenny chose to go home. He decided that the pressures of being fratty were too great, and he instead chose to delve into the neverending cycle of being a douchebag. Watch as Lenny's choice to go home systematically ruins his life...

Lenny, since he wasn't out half the night fratting hard, gets up early so he can eat a hearty breakfast before class. What is his breakfast of choice?

After years of eating these 1200 calorie delights, Lenny decides that he made the wrong decision, and decides to go out and try to frat hard. However, he does no research on how long it takes for one to learn how to frat hard, and he finds himself in a situation where the fratitude in the air is overwhelming. Lenny can't handle it, and he escapes only after substantial embarassment:

After this incident, Lenny swears off fratting hard forever. Diving head first into a life of douchebaggery, Lenny decides to start life over with a new outlook on life. he commemorates this decision with a new car. Here is Lenny sitting beside his new baby:

Unless you want this life for yourself, make the right decision when you are presented with the choice to Frat Hard or Go Home.

Fratting Hard Potential Wasted

2006-10-17T23:20:00.000-06:00

One of the most common questions we get here at FrattingHard.com is, "Can you still be fratty if you have never been in a fraternity or sorority?" The short answer is, "Yes," although successfully fratting hard will be much more difficult to the non-Greek. This requires several advanced techniques and much research and learning, and is a lesson for another day.

We often are frequently asked the inverse of the question above: "I'm in a fraternity/sorority. Am I automatically fratting?" The answer to this question is, unequivocally, "No." In a perfect world, all fraternity/sorority members would frat hard; in reality, there is no doubt that the fratty among you have observed other Greeks who frat incorrectly (or even don't frat at all). Therefore, it is important that we all continue to observe our own frattiness and do all we can to progress our fratvelopment.

In today's exercise, we will look at a picture from a Greek party; in the instant case, the function appears to be a formal or cocktail. Formals and cocktails are literal breeding ground for frattiness, and it almost takes an affirmative effort to not frat hard in such circumstances. Unfortunately, our subjects below found a way. We will first take a look at the picture, and then discuss what is wrong with this picture.

To start on a good note, we must mention that the gentleman on the right appears to be fratting hard. We can infer from this picture that a tuxedo was not required, and therefore Mr. Right opted to instead spend the time saved by not procuring a tux on more important matters (such as sleeping or watching Monday Night Football). More importantly, his facial expression exudes confidence, but not amazement. Mr. Right has been here before, and he will be here again, so he is therefore able to keep his emotions in check for maximum frat potential. Rounding out his ensemble is a diagonally striped tie, long a staple in the Fratty Man's wardrobe.

His friend, Mr. Wrong, is a polar opposite. Overdressed, Mr. Wrong appears to have lost his way between Outback and the junior-senior prom. Keeping with this theme, Mr. Wrong and the ladies in the picture appear to all be sporting corsages. This is a high school exercise, and therefore like most things high school in nature is not fratty. Although it cannot be clearly seen in this iteration of the picture, Mr. Wrong also has two earrings in his left earlobe; apparently, Mr. Wrong thought he was on the way to a rave when he accidentally stumbled into fraternity rush. The unfrattiness of this fashion statement transcends a mere frat pas and enters the realm of unabated douchebaggery.

Besides their flowery ornaments, the ladies in this picture appear to be dressed in a satisfactory fashion. However, they descend the stairs of frattiness into the firey lake of pop culture when they choose to post for the picture in the "Charley's Angels" style. The correct way to pose for a picture at a party in a fratty manner is to place one arm over the shoulder of each person beside you. In pictures of four or more people, one of the subjects on the edge may elect to forego physical contact and lean into the frame, their head and upper torso coming into the picture in front of the next person's midsection. Any free limb should be used to bring one's drink into view of the camera. This is a tried and true method of fratty tradition that is not to be altered by any except the most fratastically inclined.

The moral of this exercise is thus: it is vital that you do not let yourself fall into the trap of douchebaggery, douchbagitude, or douchenozzlality when you are in fratty situations. When you succumb to this temptation you waste valuable frat potential and eventually force yourself into a question that no truly fratty person should ever really have to think about: "Should I frat hard or go home?" Don't wait until it's too late to start fratting hard. Ingrain fratting hard into your very consciousness until it becomes second nature.

Douchebag of the Week

2006-10-05T23:44:00.000-06:00

EDIT: We have recovered a confidential public service announcement that was never aired after government intervention brought on by the disturbingly powerful douchebag lobby. We encourage you to watch this brief informational film before proceeding with the rest of the post.

The lion devours the gazelle. The owl preys on the mouse. Stingrays establish their superiority over less-than-cautious nature show hosts. It is nature's law: every species must have a natural enemy.

What, then, is the natural enemy of the Fratty? It is, undeniably, the douchebag. However, unlike the examples stated above, there is a fundamental truth which makes douchebags all the more dangerous to the Fratty. Put bluntly, we often do not know our enemy.

Douchebags come in all shapes and sizes; they run the gamut from the obvious douchenozzle all the way up to the pseudo-fratty. While the former can be spotted from a mile away, the latter may first be confused by novice Fratters with an actual Fratty person. This, of course, makes pseudo-frattys the most dangerous of all the douchebags. At best, one may recognize their telltale signs early and avoid disaster. At worst, they can be brought into the fold where they can systematically drain every ounce of frattiness in a situation. As an exercise of education, we will try to teach you, one of the Fratty, how to identify douchebags. Although this could involve lengthy discussion, we feel it is best to start with some self-education. Therefore, we present this week's "Douchebag of the Week," a photo that will allow for visual study of douchebags in action. Try to find the douchiness in the picture yourself first, and then read our explanation to see if you identified all the warning signs.

As a warm up, this week's douchebag of the week will be posted without further comment. This week's douche is, in fact, a group of douches that are douching so hard that I can smell the vinegar in the air when I see the photo. Rarely (if ever) will you need to identify such obvious douchebags. However, your education is in its infancy, and it is best to start light and work your way up the ladder of douchebag identification.

Without further discussion, we present FrattingHard.com's first Douchebag of the Week:

Fratty vs. GDI #1

2006-09-26T20:05:00.000-06:00

Car
Fratty: Frathoe
GDI: Honda Element

Shirt
Fratty: Vineyard Vines Polo
GDI: Aeropostale Hooded Sweatshirt

Drink
Fratty: Wild Turkey and Coke (Fratty Lite for Pledges)
GDI: Honda Element

Gameday Attire
Fratty: Dress shirt and tie
GDI: Body Paint

Sport
Fratty: Golf
GDI: Ultimate Frisbee

Fratting Hard All Over The World

2006-09-21T23:03:00.000-06:00

Fratting hard is not confined to the United States. As we discussed in our earlier lesson, The Deep South, fratting hard is culturally definined. As a further example, we will look at fratting throughout different world cultures.

Egypt

Most professors of fratology conclude that the early Egyptians were the first culture to frat hard. In this wall mural, we see a young man fratting hard by sitting with his hot girlfriend while a servant girl brings him wine. The hieroglyphics above read, "The wine is worth more than the servant will be paid in her life."

Turkey

Few things are frattier than dating multiple partners at once when they all know about each other and still want you. This law of fratology was first established by the rulers of the Ottoman Empire, who all boasted impressive harems of ladies who totally gave it up all the time.

Western Europe

This painting by Edouard Manet shows the typical day in the life of a European gentleman who fratted hard. Note the wasting of food because they're too rich to care, the expensive clothes, and the fact that they've got that one chick drunk enough to get naked. The girl in the background, most scholars agree, is not with the party, but is rather attempting to put her head below water in order to keep it from exploding from the fratitude which she has witnessed.

The Deep South: Is It Fratty?

2006-09-17T23:21:00.000-06:00

In our regionally segmented social society, one question that often arises in the study of Fratology is, "Are some cultures inherently fratty?" Along with this, of course, comes the inverse question, "Are some cultures inherently not fratty?"

Quite honestly, the answer to the affirmative in either case is, in almost every instance, a gross simplification. Many cultural segments which would appear, on the surface, to be devoid of fratitude may be, in fact, very fratty upon closer and more careful inspection. For instance, the nomadic sheep herders of Outer Mongolia may offend traditional notions of frattiness with their quaint dress and questionable hygeine, but at the same time may ooze fratitude with their liberal ingestion of alcoholic beverages of a strength befitting even the most effective of paint removers.

Therefore, to answer the question of cultural frattiness, one must look at the culture in question in depth. One must observe the nuances of how the fratty in that culture frat, how hard they frat, and what activities they take part in that would be generally decided to not be fratty. Pursuant to this exercise, we will now look at the culture of the Deep South of the United States.

As all that are well versed in fraternal history know, the conservative and exclusive nature of Southern fraternities has long fostered such fratty standards as fratty dress and concentration of people with rich fathers. However, recent frat scholars have noted that as admission standards have become more lax through the years some decidedly unfratty elements of general Southern society have venomously infiltrated the Southern fratmosphere. Chief among these insipid aberrations is the native Southern redneck creeping his more reprehensible tendencies into the fabric of Southern fratting.

The line which has been crossed is one that is clear, but oft ignored. This line is the difference between the redneck and the good ole boy, and the difference is, if properly examined, as clear as night and day. While the redneck and the good ole boy may enjoy similar pasttimes (football, beer, chasing women, and shooting unsuspecting wildlife), the good ole boy is always cognizent of the need to conduct themselves during said activities with a modicum of class and style. We must assume that you, as a reader of this site engaged in the advanced study of fratting hard, know the not-so-subtle differences in the two very distinct classes, so further discussion of those differences is not required. Suffice it to say, however, that the question of Southern culture, as it relates to fratting hard, is the question of "redneck or good ole boy?" If an act or omission is unique to the redneck, it is decidedly not fratty. If an act or omission is unique to the good ole boy, it is decidedly fratty.

As an exercise, we will illustrate two simple examples of this test:
1) Attending a college football game, a good ole boy will be seen in, at bare minimum, a tucked collared shirt. A redneck will be seen in the bare minimum of shirt, pants, and body paint required by law in a public forum.
2) When attempting to choose a female companion, the good ole boy will attempt to secure a lady who is both attractive and fashionable. The male redneck will, on the other hand, choose the lady with the blackest roots on the blondest hair, or possibly a lady with the most well done Hank Williams, Jr. tattoo on her lower back.

As a parting note, I leave you with a graphic representation of "Southern, done wrong." Rest assured, the young lady featured in this link is doomed to live a life that will never know the joy of truly fratting hard unless she seeks immediate and extensive fratherapy (be sure to look at the whole site):

Blessed Are the Unfratty, For They Shall Die Alone

The Dangers of Not Fratting Hard

2006-09-15T13:55:00.000-06:00

There are certain phrases in the English language that, by their very nature, should be heeded with extreme consistency on every occasion in which they are uttered. Such phrases include, “Help me, I have accidentally set my underwear ablaze,” “Get the gun, there is a mountain lion in my bedroom,” and “That looks really infected.” Thankfully, the aforementioned phrases retain their potency because we rarely, if ever, hear them unless the situation they describe is currently occurring. Unfortunately, some other phrases are no less worthy of attention, but their propensity to be casually used in every day conversation tends to deny them the respect they deserve in every instance.

One example of such a phrase is, “Frat hard or go home.” On many occasions, everyone in the room will be fratting as hard as their frat gland will allow (in such situations, the frat gland is producing the maximum amount of fratdrenaline that the body can handle; no spoken phrase can serve to force one to frat harder than one is already fratting), and yet this phrase is needlessly interjected into the conversation. The danger of this is, of course, that the phrase will not be observed when its true power is needed.

“Frat hard or go home,” is not a phrase meant to scorn. It is a phrase meant to, literally, save lives. We have all seen evenings that escalate to the point where fratdrenaline can almost be viewed in the air, and such situations create an environment that is plagued with danger for those not fratting as hard as they could physically endure. Just as driving 35 MPH on the interstate causes a hazard to both the driver and those around them, uninspired and inadequate fratting can lead to disaster when one meets the tidal wave of frat that is crashing into the room. Therefore, “Frat hard or go home,” serves to inform all present that the fratoscity of the room has reached critical levels, and those not fratting hard may be swept up and destroyed due soley to their lack of fratitude.

I am wholly unable, and my vocabulary is insufficient, to describe the horror that can occur from inadequate fratting in a frat rich environment. I feel that only a graphical display of the mayhem that light fratting creates can successfully impart the severity of my warnings. With this in mind, I submit to each of you the following link. In this woeful situation, the young victim is not only not fratting hard, but he is rather engaged in activity sure to drain even the most greedy savings account at the First International Frat Bank. I warn you, this is not pretty; however, it is of the utmost importance that each of you view the video. It might just save your life.

http://www.collegehumor.com/movies/1657942/

Do not make this young man’s mistake. Remember the acronym FRAT:

Figure out how fratty the situation you are party to is
Respect the power of the fratitude you observe
Apply your frat knowledge to raise your fratitude to an acceptable level
Tap your frat reserve account if you feel that additional emergency fratitude is necessary.

I implore each of you, frat hard or go home.

Fratting Hard.com

Fratty, Fratty, Fratty -- Frat Even Harder At Our New Site

They Should Have Just Went Home

Fratty Word/Phrase of the Week

Contribute Content to FrattingHard.com

Example of a University NOT Fratting Hard

Fratty Word/Phrase of the Week

Fratty vs. GDI #3 (Vehicle Edition)

Colleges That Are Fratting A Little Harder Today

Have a Fratty Rivalry Saturday

FH.com Under Attack

Fratty vs. GDI #2

**** DOUCHE-OFF ****

Fratting Hard in China

Fratting Hard Around the Globe: Sweden

The Downward Spiral of Not Fratting Hard

Fratting Hard Potential Wasted

Douchebag of the Week

Fratty vs. GDI #1

Fratting Hard All Over The World

The Deep South: Is It Fratty?

The Dangers of Not Fratting Hard

DOUCHE-OFF